if the end of love is this hard. i would never love again. never again.

Sunday, September 09, 2007

updates on the past few days..

friday i had a critique presentation. i was in a joyful mood in the morning but later it became sour. why it turns sour, i dun feel like explaining much. but the worst period of time was when i realise that there were 2 other groups doing the same topic as me and diana (jcu). when i saw the title page of the first group presenting, i was like sh*t. and i really exclaimed it so so loud. that i felt so embarrassed of myself. but it was really great horror to me at that time. a few seconds later, while i turn back to complain to a classmate sitting behind me, she delivered the second horror, that was, another group sitting right at the back also did the same topic. thus, there were 3 groups (including mine) presenting on the same article that day. but overall, everything seems ok. maybe i just got this get it over and done with thinking.

yesterday, went to a post teacher's day celebration. the principal of kumon gave us a treat at sizzler, toapayoh branch. i thought the price was quite reasonable. it feels like you just have to pay for the main course and you get 1 cup of free drink, but free flow of soup, salad and dessert. though the main course was quite small. but it was definitely very filling. met cs yesterday as well. it was quite a peaceful meeting. met for dinner at my house and accompanied my mum. gladful that he didn't find it boring. haha.

these few days i learn a couple of stuffs by observing other people. when there is no more love or trust, people will fight. everything that happens before their eyes are all negative. sometimes, a bystander also dunno what can they do. but it is not their fault. cos their job in the first place is to stand and watch and clear up the mess. Love, as quoted by a radio, is when one do not know why they always want to meet the other party, but they just know they want to meet.

22days to october. counting down. treasuring each day..

Thursday, September 06, 2007

the past few days had been quite a happy ones for me. maybe except for tuesday. went to work after class on tuesday. halfway through i lost my brother's pencil. as my job was to roam about to ensure that the kids know what and how to do their class work and to point out their mistakes, thus, i wasn't sitting at a particular place marking their homework. that was when i lost my brother's mechanical pencil. ok. some may find that i am making a big fuss. but i was really upset and moodless halfway through the job that i feel like telling the principal i wanna go home.

am actually a very sentimental, emotional person. i can keep crying when watching a movie. especially when it got something to do with people losing their close ones. still dun get it? you see, movie is just a fabricated story that ain't real in life but yet, i can cry as if i was one of the characters in the movie.

well, the point is, anything that was given by my brother i treasured alot. to think that i lost it, just make me feel so sad. it is just purely automatic feeling. did not think much like he gonna scold me for it or wat. in fact, he might scold me for being silly cos it is just a pencil. well, ain't sure if anyone would understand cos even my mum said it is just a pencil. but... i wish one of the kid can just return me if they mistook it!!!!

nevertheless, everyday is a happy one for me. it is an improvement isn't it? hope it stays like this all the way. treat everyday like it is the only day and be happy. lastly, never take things for granted. be glad that others are making an effort to compromise and not they have to do it. thus, i am really glad and thankful to be compromised everytime.

Sunday, September 02, 2007

today ended well again. thankfully. am very very glad it did.

this afternoon started alright. but towards evening, it kinda got a little sobby. still, we manage to reach an agreement. aint sure if it was an agreement that both were really satisfied. but at least i gain more confidence through this matter. even though it might only be for a few days. afterall, no one changes just at a snap of the finger. lots of encouragement and support and priming is needed. but at least at this moment, i have hope. that's all that really matters.. thank you to you..

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

woke up full of energy to get things started. but now. no longer feeling that.

yesterday ended quite peacefully and happily. though there was not much talking. spent alot of time travelling. that was what i wanted. away from the weekend crowd. even though he is tired. but he still tag along without any grumble. thankful for that. avoided all sad topics. thus, i was glad that it ended how i wish it would be.

today is another brand new day. like i say, i wanted to get things started. but, along the way, a problem of mine came up and my mood vanish right at that moment. am going to push myself to start up again. cos i dunno what is going to happen later.. haix. *positive positive.

life in crisis...

Saturday, September 01, 2007

had a long long day yesterday. but feeling much better today. =) waiting for 2pm to come. excited as well as nervous. trying to condition myself to be positive before the time comes. so far, doing good. current mood: positive and smiling. hopefully today's outing would be a happy one. as tml might be a sad day. *once again. i might be just thinking too much. hopefully when i am back, i would blog about the happy events today. provided i am not lazy too.. haha.. =)